Bournemouth Writers Humorous Story Competition

On 8 July, I presented the awards to the winners of the Bournemouth Writers Humorous Story Competition at Kinson Community Centre.

I had originally been rquested to read the entries, write critiques, select the first, second and third-placed entries and turn up on the evening but I asked if I could deliver a short presentation as well as I didn't want to just turn up with my opinions on which was the best and perhaps have some newer members wondering who on earth I was and how I was qualified to judge their competition. Sure, an entry in a programme can give a brief bio but demonstrating knowledge in a talk gives a much better idea of one's credentials.

This may sound incredible to any readers who are still reluctant speakers but...

Public Speaking Tip #230: When you become a regular public speaker, you may well reach the stage where you would prefer to be a speaker at an event than a 'mere' spectator!

Just one small challenge with this - I had spoken to Bournemouth Writers' Circle on four previous occasions: talks in 1997 and 1998, their annual lunch in 2002 and another talk in 2006 so could I come up with anything new to tell them in a 25-minute talk? Yes, by concentrating on my more recent writing as a columnist, self-publisher and, of course, blogger, and by making ever-changing markets my general theme. And it turned out that there were several who had never heard me before among the 30 in attendance and no-one seemed to mind a little recapping from earlier talks with regards to how I started as a comedy scriptwriter, writing for radio, etc.

Then it was time to announce the competition winners. There was merit in all eight entries but I managed to whittle them down to three. What was difficult was choosing which should be the winner and runner-up. One story was laugh-out-loud funny and struck me as being very marketable to women's magazines. The other was a more subtle, observational moral tale and after much deliberation, I selected this one as the winner.

When the entries were read out, the runner-up got big laughs with her story. The winner was a reluctant speaker so she asked a member called Cass (incidentally, the author of the third-placed entry) to read her work out for her. He is excellent at this and even though he was sight-reading, he put it across very well but I noticed that the response was quieter than for the previous entry, smiles rather than loud laughs.

But I still feel that I made the best choice. When I was writing for BBC Radio, I worked for many years on two long-running topical satire shows, often in the same week. The News Huddlines on Radio 2 was recorded in front of a studio audience of 300 and their laughter determined whether a joke or sketch survived the edit. Week Ending on Radio 4 was a subtler show with more of an emphasis on politics. It wasn't recorded in front of a live audience and there was no assumption that every item would elicit a laugh-out-loud response from the listeners at home but at least a smile of recognition.

Writing for both shows taught me a great deal and I remember each with huge affection. Week Ending gave me my first nationally broadcast items and the satisfaction of hearing some of my driest humour going out on air. The Huddlines gave me the pleasure of hearing a live audience respond to my humorous inventions, taught me how to write longer radio sketches, led to the TV appearance which resulted in my becoming a public speaker and having it on my CV still helps to get me work as a writer and speaker. Just one other thing about those two radio shows - despite them being broadcast on different channels, many of the same listeners appreciated both.  And these two competition entries were like a Week Ending and a News Huddlines - the humour of each worked but in different ways for the same people.

Public Speaking Tip #231: Although humour for a live audience has to elicit an audible response overall, not every joke or observation has to produce a belly laugh to be appreciated. There is room for subtler wit as well.

Arqiva Commercial Radio Awards 2008

Anyone who has read this blog from the start may remember that the very first entry was about last year's Arqiva Commercial Radio Awards, which I was invited to attend as a guest at the Radio Magazine's table.

On 7 July, the event was held once again at the Royal Lancaster Hotel in London and compered, as usual, by Virgin Radio's Christian O'Connell.

At these awards, they always have two guest music acts: a newcomer to open and a big name to close the proceedings. This year's closer was James Morrison, who had performed there as the unknown act just a few years earlier. His interview with Christian was positive, enthusiastic and funny and he gave a relaxed performance that was very well-received.

The singer who had the daunting task of going on before the awards started was Jessie. She looks great and has a very powerful voice which sounds at least as good to me as Amy Winehouse or Duffy. She writes her own songs and introduced each of the three with some self-effacing humour.

The stage area at the Arqiva Awards is always filmed and projected onto massive screens so that those of us at tables towards the back of the hotel's massive Nine Kings Suite can see what's happening! Jessie not only gave a mesmerising vocal performance, she also looked stunning the whole time, her use of gesture and facial expression demonstrating that she was fully in control of how she was coming across on those screens at any given moment. Performing in front of 700 people from the radio industry was a major opportunity for her and I could see that she gave it everything she had.

Public Speaking Tip #227: It is a real joy for everyone when a performer of any kind meets - and exceeds - the demands of a big occasion.

Her table was near ours and I noticed that when James Morrison was performing, she stood up and moved a little closer to watch him - one professional learning from another.

The announcer was Heart FM's Neil Bentley who, I noticed, used gestures as he spoke, despite not being a focal point as he was positioned at the other end of the stage. I imagine that he does this when broadcasting and I find myself doing it when speaking on the phone or giving a radio interview. It feels natural.

Public Speaking Tip #228: You can find yourself in visual 'public speaking mode' even when you are not visible to your audience. Voice and body language are linked. If it helps your vocal delivery then why not?

Christian O'Connell had some great material although there was one gag which went a bit too far in terms of bad taste and got a very muted response but he very cleverly extricated himself with a follow-up line and got away with it!

Every joke and humorous observation he used was relevant to the event/radio industry, from the cheesescake starter to advertising, layoffs and the dodgy competitions which some stations have recently been in trouble over. He also added some very sharp off-the-cuff lines as he chatted with guest award presenters.

A no-nonsense argument for using tailored material can be found in the foreword to John Bolton's After Dinner Speeches and Stories. He writes: 'The jokes should be... always in context. They should not be dragged in merely for the sake of their humorous appeal. To tell a golfing story at the Golf Club's Annual Dinner will be appreciated, and you will acquire a reputation as a witty speaker; to tell the same story at a dinner for a visiting celebrity will merely label you as being "rather stupid". Make full use of humour when the subject demands it, but make sure you are using the humour that fits the situation'.

Although this event was somewhat different from a golf club dinner. there were some speakers dotted among the celebs presenting awards whose appearance/speaking style were more like those you might expect at a business function, such as Jeremy Hunt, Shadow Culture Secretary and the occasional sober-suited senior figure from the radio industry. This was not the easiest arena for these more formal speakers but they kept their speeches short and delivered them with confidence.

Public Speaking Tip #229: If faced with an audience where you are something of an 'odd man out' - for example, a politician in front of 700 media types where the booze is flowing! - do not try to be something you are not but keep your remarks as brief and to the point as possible.

Presenters of awards included Nicholas Parsons, Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen, Krishnan Guru-Murthy, Fiona Phillips, Mark Goodier and Tony Blackburn and it was a great opportunity to see the relaxed manner in which these famous broadcasters spoke. There was also a nice acceptance speech from Neil Fox, recipient of the Arqiva Gold Award. He said he was emotional but at no time did he come anywhere near plumbing the depths of Academy Award winners' histrionics!

Chatting afterwards was practically impossible as this year's event featured a disco with Neil Bentley now meeting the challenge of DJ-ing in front of hundreds of his peers so I left the hotel, once again grateful for having been given the opportunity to observe at close quarters the public speaking expertise of some of the best in the business.