Personalised speechwriting commissions

There was no sitting back and relaxing after the Hereford and Kent talks as I had two speechwriting commissions to complete over the weekend. I am delighted that this website and blog are producing this kind of work and these two speeches, one for a golf captain and one for a Best Man, added a couple more to the list of countries where speeches I have written have been delivered, although the speakers themselves were from the UK. 

My approach differs from that of some other speechwriters and I make no apology for this. They compile speeches consisting of wall-to-wall one-liners which certainly get laughs but seem hollow and lacking in personalisation or meaning. There is also the likelihood that many of those present will have heard at least some of these gags before which further detracts from the feeling of a tailored speech.

I prefer to write speeches which are similar to those I deliver myself i.e. consisting of genuinely amusing anecdotes with the minimum of embellishment. These are enlivened by humorous observations and asides and some original (often topical) jokes. There may be occasions when a 'classic' old gag may fit but usually the only older items I include will be quotations - and even these will not always be the most well-known. The result has been a succession of extremely well-received speeches and glowing testimonials over the past 13 years, which (when you consider that a speechwriter is not writing for a trained, professional performer) just goes to show the power of humorous content with some substance: the speaker feels more positive about delivering it and the audience gets more from listening to it.

Public Speaking Tip #204: Personalised humour based around short but funny anecdotes will always be more meaningful and memorable than trying to crowbar in a load of one-liners that are doing the rounds - especially in an age where so many jokes are now circulating among huge numbers of people through emails, text messages etc.

Of course, in order for me to write this sort of personalised speech, I do need to have adequate background information to work with and I was pleased that the clients I was writing these speeches for had provided me with excellent details of the personalities they wished to mention, anecdotes to rewrite into their funniest form, etc.

Sadly, this isn't always the case. Two years ago, I was asked by a client living in a 'millionaire's playground' to script two 5-minute speeches, one for a function where he was being made a life member of a sporting club which he had been associated with for decades and another for his 70th birthday celebrations. The first event was four months way and the second two months after that but he said he wanted both speeches within six weeks. I told him that I would need background information, anecdotes, etc. For the sporting event, he simply sent a list of the victories he had been associated with, details which his audience would already be well aware of; to simply recount them would have sounded like bragging. For his 70th birthday party I got even less to work with: just his date of birth!

With just days to go before the deadline, I emailed him begging for some (any!) info. He replied that he had no anecdotes that were repeatable and that I should suggest some - as if I had lived his life for him! I spent hours on the net trying to find out anything about him or his club that I could use but it was hopeless. The deadline arrived (still two months before the first speech was due and four before the second) and he emailed to say that it was all too late now and impatiently demanded a refund. I made what I believe was a perfectly justifiable deduction for the huge amount of time I had spent trying to research some background because of his refusal to provide any. Fortunately, I have never had a case like this before or since.

Public Speaking Tip #205: I am assuming that many readers of this blog will write their own speeches, presentations, etc, but if you do use the services of a professional speechwriter then give them the best chance to do the best job for you by providing them with adequate information to work with. If you are going to invest money to get a bespoke script then you should also invest some time to think about relevant details for the writer to utilise. You will find that it is well worth the effort.

The Best Man's speech I was finishing was actually a Best Men's speech - a two-hander. These are not uncommon and can work very well. The trick is for both speakers to have an equal share of stories regarding the groom that are relevant to them, an equal division of laughs plus, of course, the more serious content, formalities, etc. And unlike a longer, two-handed presentation, it doesn't matter so much if this sounds scripted - a wedding is, after all, a formal occasion.

Public Speaking Tip #206: Two-handed speeches, such as for Best Men at a wedding, can be very effective if the content is shared equally. Resist the temptation to have a 'Straight Man - Comedian' double act!

I had been asked to write enough for the two speakers to be on their feet for 10 minutes but I was provided with such good background information that I was able to write enough for 15 (I always write more than I am asked for anyway; this not only gives the client better value for money but also more choice about what content to include) so I imagined that they would omit a third of it but I received an email which said:

"We went ahead with the speech...about 90% faithful to your script. It went really well".

The teamwork of good background information + a good, original, personalised script = a successful speech.